Joy In The Midst of Struggles

This whole post grad life job-hunting is not as easy as one may think. I must say I think i was naive when thinking about post-grad life and how i thought it would not be that hard to find a job. welp reality sure did hit and here i am three weeks post grad and honestly have no idea what i am doing. yes i have: -had 2 job interviews -applied to probably 30 jobs -no success so far all i want to do is pursue my passion of helping others with disabilities but how can i do that if i don't have a job? well let me tell you what i have learned in the midst of this dry patch. why would one want to hire a person with a disability? this thought has popped in my head hundreds of times in what you would call post-grad life. i have learned that in interviews i have to address the elephant in the room which is my physical disability. i can guarantee the person that is interviewing me is thinking hmmm how is this girl going to do well with a disability. it is just another obstacle in li...

4 years ago I remember crying all the time as I was preparing to move out for college. I was so nervous transitioning to living on my own because I did not think i could do it. i was scared that my roommate would not be helpful or judge me for my disability. i didn't think i could make friends or do my own laundry or go get food all the time. what if i couldn't open something who would help me? these were the thoughts of my mind freshmen year. but now let me tell you how those thoughts were completely wiped away and what i have gone through in these past 4 years have completely blown my mind and i have seen God's beauty work through my life to make me the completely independent person living with a disability i could be. my first big step was applying to be an alpha leader and i got it! i got the opportunity to be a student leader. i got the opportunity to go on bridges, which is physical demanding because you have to walk and serve all over san fran. when i accomplished ...

This last week I had the wonderful opportunity to go to Puerto Rico with Lifetree Organization. I thought i should write about the many things God showed me over there and the many conversations i walked away knowing God's presence. first off, going into this trip i was nervous because what we were going to be doing was repairing homes. i did not know what exactly this meant and if i was going to be able to do the work. but right away the Lord assured me that he sent me to Puerto Rico for a reason and i should not doubt. well, He provided and this week we were to be painting the inside and outside of this elderly lady's home. PAINTING ! that is just perfect. i could do painting no problem. so the first worry was checked off and let me know the Lord was watching out for me. then we were told that there were 2 houses to do and we would be divided into 2 groups. the house i got chosen for was a lady named Vangelita. she lives with her 49 year old son who has polio which is the...

Last night in my psych of the exceptional child class we had a thought provoking discussion. We looked at the verse in Psalms that talks about God knitting us in our mother's womb and how we are fearfully and wonderfully made in God's image. my professor then asked us how we can apply that to our future students. at first i was thinking that i would tell my students with disabilities that they are made for a purpose and God did not make a mistake in creating them with a disability but then my professor threw us for a loop when she said what happens when that child says how could God make me fearfully and wonderfully made when i have such a flaw as a disability. how could God make a person with a disability when a disability is not wonderful at all?  for me this thought pained my heart for i do not think this way. but what would i say to that question ? through reflection i would say that God loves each individual. we are not made perfect and that is so we can seek God in our ...

There are two things that have come across me in this past week i thought i'd share.. first: it is interesting to me when i come in contact with an individual and they talk to my friend instead of me to ask a question. this happened to me last week where an individual who has come in contact with me several times and knows i am fully capable of talking turned to my friend to ask a question about me instead of asking it directly to me. now through my growth in figuring out what it is like to live with a disability and see the good in everything that happens i have viewed this situation differently. a year ago if this would have happened i would have walked away annoyed and bitter but through God working in me i have learned it is okay. individuals often feel uncomfortable when approaching a person with a disability because often times they have not interacted with a disabled person. i totally understand and forgive this individual because to think about it in their shoes i may h...

LABELED . The word majority of people fear. It has been brought up to me recently about how people have the fear to be labeled. I am in a psych class for the exceptional child and this topic came up last night. One big barrier for kids with special needs is there parents not wanting them to get help because they don't want their child to be "labeled". because of this the child suffers because he/she cannot get help and teachers have to be on their tip-toes to not offend the parent(s) or the child. Don't get me wrong.. i feel for these parents. we live in a world that people need to be perfect and if you are not perfect then you failed. so for a parent to have a kid with a disability, they feel as if they did not do their job  correctly. it is a hard truth and one that i know my parents and myself had to deal with. but what i want the parents to realize is it is their job to turn that label into a positive.. However,  this brings me to another thought as to why I ...

What does this year of 2014 look like for me? it is a year of change, a year of finding God's beauty in everyday life, appreciating what i have at every moment, growing in myself and my God , helping others, being a light for others, having new experiences, letting God shine through me. every time at new years people make "resolutions". majority of the time these resolutions get forgotten about within weeks or months. for me i just want to give this year to God and really try to let go and remember He has plans for me and I just have to listen. God has called me on this earth for a reason and i want to be in awe of Him everyday. i am not going to lie though that this year is going to be filled with worries, unknowns, and changes. i will be graduating from APU in May this year which is such an exciting but scary event. i must say that i am also proud of myself. for being a person with a disability so many individuals think there is not that great of a future for u...