Skip to main content

A S H A M E D

A S H A M E D

This word has wrecked me.
This word is nasty.
This word hinders.
This word prevents people from being themselves.
This word has has been on my mind ever since Kenya.


You know one thing I did not expect when I went to Kenya is that I would get to work with the disabled population. I got to go into homes and visit and pray with differently abled individuals and their families. One thing that has wrecked me is how ashamed they are of differently abled individuals. They do not let them out of their houses, they do not have resources for them, they do not have individuals to encourage them to seek help. They are ashamed and hide them from the world. My heart has been broken ever since then. 

I don't think that word ever crossed my mind throughout my life. Yes I have hated or been frustrated with my disability but I don't think I have ever felt ashamed. I have been talking this through with many individuals trying to grasp what I am feeling. It has made me think that we still have people here who are still ashamed. Nobody thinks when they are having a child that their child will have a disability. Some do not know what to do with that thought and become ashamed that they could not have a "normal" child. I tend to think the Lord blessed me with parents who heard my diagnosis and said we will give our daughter the best help she needs. I think because of my parents and surrounding family and friends I grew up with being comfortable in my own skin but a lot of people do not get that lucky.'

So what is there to do?
We need to speak words of hope and love. My goodness, can we please just love those who are different? Is it too hard to ask for us to speak beautiful words to strangers? Why do these people feel ashamed? Because they do not feel the love and encouragement from others. The differently abled get the weird looks and the people who turn the other direction. If you see something beautiful, please speak it. The one of many things that Kenya has taught me is how beautiful it is to get out of your comfort zone and speak words of beauty. Look them in the eye. Tell them they are so strong and beautiful and God has made you beautiful and you should never ever be ashamed.

***still working through this. These are my continual thoughts lately.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Pregnancy & Birth

 Hi there! I know I do not blog on here on a regular basis anymore but my baby is napping and I wanted a place where I could remember the beauty of my pregnancy and birth. So here we go... June 20, 2023: I found out I was pregnant! Cue all the emotions (excited, nervous, scared) and the now what!  June-July 2023: I had just switched to my husband's insurance so I didn't have a doctor or anything. Luckily, with Kaiser I was able to get in pretty quickly. You see I wanted to be seen pretty quickly because I was on medication. I have been on medication since I was 15 for my spasticity/shakiness in my hands. Mind you I was 30 when I found out I was pregnant so I have been on this medication 3 times a day for half of my life 😲. I had no idea how my body would react to being off of it or even the process of getting off the medication. At first I was getting varying opinions about whether to stop cold turkey or to stay on it. Eventually, I spoke with my neurologist (who I wasn't ...
Post a Comment
Read more

You talk funny

So I have always debated about doing a post on this subject but I always convince myself not to but my hope for this blog is to enlighten others about the disabled community so here it goes... Let's talk about my speech and how I talk... This is a rough topic because I never really have told others about this insecurity of mine but I have recently gotten peace about it and I feel like I finally embrace it You know having Cerebral Palsy it affects your muscles and one of those muscles it affects for me is my tongue. Thus is why I do talk differently. I went to a speech therapists from one I was in kindergarten all the way to about 5th grade. My speech has improved greatly from it but yes I do still talk differently. So can I tell you growing up and honestly until about a month ago I used to HATE hearing my voice on any recording. It would make me so uncomfortable because in my head the way that I hear myself I sound normal. So then when I go to hear my voice on a recording I...
3 comments
Read more

Acceptance

For those of you that follow me on Instagram or Facebook you have probably seen my yoga videos that I have been putting up. On the recent one I had a friend comment about how much she loved my openness and confidence. This really got me thinking about what a road I have been on to get me to where I am at today. Back when I was a senior in high school I got nominated the most inspirational senior. Now when you are nominated for this award you have to write a speech and make the speech in front of the whole school at an assembly. I remember when I first found out I started bawling. Like what? People think I'm inspiring? At that time I was NOT comfortable speaking about my disability. In fact I couldn't even read the speech my principal had to because I was a wreck and was far from confident in myself. Even halfway through college I was not comfortable mentioning my disability. It was like the BIG elephant in the room. It made me nervous and I thought people already see that I...
3 comments
Read more